Friendly Arguments Please

Discussion in 'Forum News and Announcements' started by Jim, Oct 19, 2009.

  1. Jim

    Jim Ringleader

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    This is addressed to some new funsters who might not be sure how we do things here.

    Heated debate


    Sometimes, when discussions get heated (almost always off topic:RollEyes:) and posters have deeply opposing points of view; things can get a little messy. That's not fun:Smile:

    You should remember that when you argue/debate topics here with another poster you are basically saying the other person is wrong about whatever. These opposing viewpoints can of course lead to some humdinger arguments that can be entertaining to read or partake in. However in our forum environment you have to show the other poster that you are attacking the poster's argument only and not the poster.

    When you disagree with a person instead of their argument, you make the whole thread a personal issue. When it comes to personal issues, many people are hard-wired to become defensive. The more you disagree with a person directly, the more the other person/poster will feel defensive and want to win the argument at any cost. It's important to remember that only the other person can let you win an argument. Insult them and the argument will go on, no matter who is right.

    Disagree with someone's argument and not them.
    No matter how heated the debate, you should at the same time be friendly, focus on what is said (the argument) and not who said it. If you are friendly, polite and right, more often than not, the other poster will acknowledge of their own free will that you are right. However use terms that I have seen lately like "get a life" "a bigots point of view" and the arguments just become tit for tat, boring insults and that's just not fun.

    Please have your humdinger debates, but be nice:BigGrin:
     
  2. Blisters

    Blisters Read Only Funster

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    FIGHT:boxing:
     
    Last edited: Oct 19, 2009
  3. Jim

    Jim Ringleader

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    Who's first :boxing:


    :Smile:
     
  4. Spacerunner

    Spacerunner Read Only Funster

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    hardhat,,not just a leetle bit of blood? :boxing: aww c'mon...:RollEyes:
     
  5. pappajohn

    pappajohn Funster Life Member

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    you'll win Jim....you got bigger gloves. :Rofl1:
     
  6. scotjimland

    scotjimland Funster Life Member

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    errrr.. no,

    he'll win by banning you ... :Rofl1::Rofl1:
     
  7. pappajohn

    pappajohn Funster Life Member

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    :Eeek: :cry:
     
  8. theresa

    theresa Read Only Funster

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    now boys play nice lol :Rofl1::Rofl1::Rofl1::Rofl1:
     
  9. The Wallace

    The Wallace Read Only Funster

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    Methinks someone protests to much.

    Sometimes one can try to hard to ensure 'fun'.

    Even the mods on 'facts' let some blood flow before clamping down.
     
  10. Jim

    Jim Ringleader

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    I rest my case:BigGrin:
     
  11. sinbad1

    sinbad1 Deleted User

    Good post now the vampires will know where to go for there fix :BigGrin:
     
  12. JJ

    JJ Funster

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    When ever there is an argument involving me always, always bet on the other person...
    I am wrong so often I have got used to it...

    I just "lost" a bet involving my first born child, both my motorhomes and my Man City Access card because I was wrong about which series of 24 I had just seen!

    Luckily the victor doesn't drive but I will miss my dear daughter... (and my CityCard)

    JJ
     
  13. N Luyetund

    N Luyetund Deleted User

    Dear Jim

    imagine.... someone has a 'personal' pop at you....


    OK, just how friendly do you feel towards that person now?

    ..my case is in the rest position too

    Fun is available in various guises :Rofl1:
     
  14. N Luyetund

    N Luyetund Deleted User

    Relax Jim, no-one on here has that much bottle:Wink:
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Oct 20, 2009
  15. jhorsf

    jhorsf Read Only Funster

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    plenty of other forums for falling out we are here for FUNsters:BigGrin:
     
  16. takeaflight

    takeaflight Read Only Funster

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    It could be the fact that we are all getting older :Doh:

    And IMHO getting older equates to getting grumpier :Angry:

    At least me and my dog are :Blush:

    getting grumpier with age that is :Wink:

    Oh and fatter :Eeek:
     
  17. old-mo

    old-mo Funster Extra Special Life Member

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    I think a lot of it is hot air and spur of the moment "Posting".. :Doh:

    I know I have typed a few times and hit the submit button,, only a few minutes later to think "you stupid bugger",, What did I write that for.. :Blush:

    And on one or two occassions I even P.M.`d the person it was aimed at to appologies, and inform them it was only meant to be a joke should it have been taken the wrong way.. :cry:

    I try now to type my message and sit back and read a few times to see if it is appropriate, before hitting the "Submit Reply" button.. :Smile:

    Now shall I hit the submit button.? "Yes" not going to upset any body, I hope.. :Wink:









    "I dont do serious,, life is to short".. :Wink:
     
  18. haganap

    haganap Funster Life Member

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    quite right Mo,

    I also think it is the innability to see personal clues, like any body language etc. I know that its the same with texting. you need to feel tone of voice and or see movement to know exactly how someone is portraying their argument. Sadly you can not do that with a forum, even with the use of smilies./
     
  19. Blisters

    Blisters Read Only Funster

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    I think that 99% of funsters deserve a big pat on the back, however on this forum as on any other forum there is/are always that 1% who are naturally antaganistic.

    Probably because most motorhomers are of more advanced years (old gits:Rofl1:) we don't raise to the bait.

    Most have more class than to lower their standards to gutter level. But doesn't it always seem to be, that it is a mindless minority that always seem to be at the centre of these threads.

    I guess we all read these threads and say oh He/She is at it again, can't seem to help themselves. Old Mo is right, we should think before hitting the post button (especially if we're replying as a knee jerk reaction - after all we all have bottle when wound up)

    Maybe we should all look at the man (or woman) in the mirror.
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    :Eeek: gosh that scared me, and to think the wife has to wake up to it every morning:Rofl1:
     
  20. davetthedon

    davetthedon Read Only Funster

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    Hey just found the multiquote button DOHH :Doh:. I agree with you two, also there is no point in losing it online, whats the point of alienating someone who you probably have never met, might meet one day, and have probably blown a possibly good friendship with, just because you've probably had too much to drink, sitting in your kitchen while SWMBO watches holby, casualty, eastenders, come dancing, xfactor etc etc and you're just in an arsey mood because you want to watch the film. It passes. and the next day you feel like a shit, and you've lost a possible mate, and you've got to apologise, an the moderator has banned you, and you need some help. Its supposed to be FUN here, so lighten up you grumpy old farts, and ENJOY life. I've just sat in a traffic jam on the M5 for an hour and a half so need to blow off steam!!!!!!
    Just re-reading this.
    Thanks for the post Jim and the opportunity to let off steam now and then.:thumb: Cheaper than a shrink.
    ATB
    DaveT
     

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