Friendly Arguments Please (1 Viewer)

Jim

Ringleader
Jul 19, 2007
36,187
128,610
Sutton on Sea, UK
Funster No
1
MH
Adria Panel Van.
Exp
Since 1988
This is addressed to some new funsters who might not be sure how we do things here.

Heated debate


Sometimes, when discussions get heated (almost always off topic:RollEyes:) and posters have deeply opposing points of view; things can get a little messy. That's not fun:Smile:

You should remember that when you argue/debate topics here with another poster you are basically saying the other person is wrong about whatever. These opposing viewpoints can of course lead to some humdinger arguments that can be entertaining to read or partake in. However in our forum environment you have to show the other poster that you are attacking the poster's argument only and not the poster.

When you disagree with a person instead of their argument, you make the whole thread a personal issue. When it comes to personal issues, many people are hard-wired to become defensive. The more you disagree with a person directly, the more the other person/poster will feel defensive and want to win the argument at any cost. It's important to remember that only the other person can let you win an argument. Insult them and the argument will go on, no matter who is right.

Disagree with someone's argument and not them.
No matter how heated the debate, you should at the same time be friendly, focus on what is said (the argument) and not who said it. If you are friendly, polite and right, more often than not, the other poster will acknowledge of their own free will that you are right. However use terms that I have seen lately like "get a life" "a bigots point of view" and the arguments just become tit for tat, boring insults and that's just not fun.

Please have your humdinger debates, but be nice::bigsmile:
 

The Wallace

Free Member
Apr 3, 2009
367
5
Funster No
6,135
Methinks someone protests to much.

Sometimes one can try to hard to ensure 'fun'.

Even the mods on 'facts' let some blood flow before clamping down.

Subscribers  do not see these advertisements

 
S

sinbad1

Deleted User
Methinks someone protests to much.

Sometimes one can try to hard to ensure 'fun'.

Even the mods on 'facts' let some blood flow before clamping down.

Good post now the vampires will know where to go for there fix ::bigsmile:
 

JJ

Mágica
May 1, 2008
19,228
47,725
Quinta Majay, Pinheiro Bordalo, Portugal
Funster No
2,459
MH
Burstner Privilege T
Exp
over 50 years
When ever there is an argument involving me always, always bet on the other person...
I am wrong so often I have got used to it...

I just "lost" a bet involving my first born child, both my motorhomes and my Man City Access card because I was wrong about which series of 24 I had just seen!

Luckily the victor doesn't drive but I will miss my dear daughter... (and my CityCard)

JJ

Subscribers  do not see these advertisements

 
N

N Luyetund

Deleted User
Dear Jim

imagine.... someone has a 'personal' pop at you....


OK, just how friendly do you feel towards that person now?

..my case is in the rest position too

Fun is available in various guises :ROFLMAO:
 

jhorsf

Free Member
May 15, 2009
9,130
8,045
DERBYSHIRE
Funster No
6,717
MH
ih oregon
Exp
2000
plenty of other forums for falling out we are here for FUNsters::bigsmile:

Subscribers  do not see these advertisements

 

takeaflight

Free Member
Sep 4, 2007
255
1
Stratford-upon-Avon
Funster No
222
MH
Hymer
Exp
4
It could be the fact that we are all getting older :Doh:

And IMHO getting older equates to getting grumpier :Angry:

At least me and my dog are :Blush:

getting grumpier with age that is :winky:

Oh and fatter :Eeek:
 

old-mo

Funster
Extra Special
LIFE MEMBER
Oct 16, 2008
16,341
93,473
Weymouth. Dorset...
Funster No
4,470
MH
Nearly aint got one.
Exp
Caravan & motorhome 45 + yrs
I think a lot of it is hot air and spur of the moment "Posting".. :Doh:

I know I have typed a few times and hit the submit button,, only a few minutes later to think "you stupid bugger",, What did I write that for.. :Blush:

And on one or two occassions I even P.M.`d the person it was aimed at to appologies, and inform them it was only meant to be a joke should it have been taken the wrong way.. :cry:

I try now to type my message and sit back and read a few times to see if it is appropriate, before hitting the "Submit Reply" button.. :Smile:

Now shall I hit the submit button.? "Yes" not going to upset any body, I hope.. :winky:









"I dont do serious,, life is to short".. :winky:
 

haganap

LIFE MEMBER
Dec 5, 2007
12,710
25,964
planet earth
Funster No
974
MH
Carthago C Tourer
Exp
I'm an oldbie MH number 9
I think a lot of it is hot air and spur of the moment "Posting".. :Doh:

I know I have typed a few times and hit the submit button,, only a few minutes later to think "you stupid bugger",, What did I write that for.. :Blush:

And on one or two occassions I even P.M.`d the person it was aimed at to appologies, and inform them it was only meant to be a joke should it have been taken the wrong way.. :cry:

I try now to type my message and sit back and read a few times to see if it is appropriate, before hitting the "Submit Reply" button.. :Smile:

Now shall I hit the submit button.? "Yes" not going to upset any body, I hope.. :winky:









"I dont do serious,, life is to short".. :winky:


quite right Mo,

I also think it is the innability to see personal clues, like any body language etc. I know that its the same with texting. you need to feel tone of voice and or see movement to know exactly how someone is portraying their argument. Sadly you can not do that with a forum, even with the use of smilies./

Subscribers  do not see these advertisements

 

Blisters

Free Member
Apr 2, 2008
597
4
Stoke on Trent
Funster No
2,042
MH
A Class
Exp
March 2006
I think that 99% of funsters deserve a big pat on the back, however on this forum as on any other forum there is/are always that 1% who are naturally antaganistic.

Probably because most motorhomers are of more advanced years (old gits:ROFLMAO:) we don't raise to the bait.

Most have more class than to lower their standards to gutter level. But doesn't it always seem to be, that it is a mindless minority that always seem to be at the centre of these threads.

I guess we all read these threads and say oh He/She is at it again, can't seem to help themselves. Old Mo is right, we should think before hitting the post button (especially if we're replying as a knee jerk reaction - after all we all have bottle when wound up)

Maybe we should all look at the man (or woman) in the mirror.
.
.
.
.
.
:Eeek: gosh that scared me, and to think the wife has to wake up to it every morning:ROFLMAO:
 

davetthedon

Free Member
Mar 25, 2009
141
2
Malvern, Worcestershire
Funster No
6,053
MH
GreatBig Bugger
Exp
10
I think a lot of it is hot air and spur of the moment "Posting".. :Doh:

I know I have typed a few times and hit the submit button,, only a few minutes later to think "you stupid bugger",, What did I write that for.. :Blush:

And on one or two occassions I even P.M.`d the person it was aimed at to appologies, and inform them it was only meant to be a joke should it have been taken the wrong way.. :cry:

I try now to type my message and sit back and read a few times to see if it is appropriate, before hitting the "Submit Reply" button.. :Smile:

Now shall I hit the submit button.? "Yes" not going to upset any body, I hope.. :winky:









"I dont do serious,, life is to short".. :winky:

quite right Mo,

I also think it is the innability to see personal clues, like any body language etc. I know that its the same with texting. you need to feel tone of voice and or see movement to know exactly how someone is portraying their argument. Sadly you can not do that with a forum, even with the use of smilies./

Hey just found the multiquote button DOHH :Doh:. I agree with you two, also there is no point in losing it online, whats the point of alienating someone who you probably have never met, might meet one day, and have probably blown a possibly good friendship with, just because you've probably had too much to drink, sitting in your kitchen while SWMBO watches holby, casualty, eastenders, come dancing, xfactor etc etc and you're just in an arsey mood because you want to watch the film. It passes. and the next day you feel like a shit, and you've lost a possible mate, and you've got to apologise, an the moderator has banned you, and you need some help. Its supposed to be FUN here, so lighten up you grumpy old farts, and ENJOY life. I've just sat in a traffic jam on the M5 for an hour and a half so need to blow off steam!!!!!!
Just re-reading this.
Thanks for the post Jim and the opportunity to let off steam now and then.:thumb: Cheaper than a shrink.
ATB
DaveT
 

The Wallace

Free Member
Apr 3, 2009
367
5
Funster No
6,135
so lighten up you grumpy old farts, and ENJOY life.
The problem with forums (fori) is that, as a grumpy old fart, I could take that as a personal attack.

The old song about "not what you do, it's the way that you do it!" could apply to posting.
It is so easy for a post to upset at least some of the membership some of the time.

If someone makes a racist statement some members may feel it is fair game to point out that that person could be mistaken in their beliefs.
To some that will be seen as an attack on the posters racism and will be justified and to others it will be seen as an attack on the poster.

Unless every post is subject to a censor before being published you will always have contentious issues creeping in and they will lead to insults being traded.
How many times do we see references to government policy being slipped into thread? - to me this is not Fun and not acceptable. To others it is fair game.

How many threads lead into "discussions" about travelers? - to me anyone who fulltimes is a "traveler". To others this is a heretical statement and will lead to threats of violence because "I fulltime but paid my taxes"!

You can even have a barney over to SOG or not to SOG!

To strive for total fun is fun but not very realistic.
It is also damned boring and smacks of a Facts type overmoding which is what I was alluding to in my " even they let some blood flow" statement.

I was neither supporting nor challenging any point of view on the subject, just making an observation.

Happy camping,

Subscribers  do not see these advertisements

 

The Wallace

Free Member
Apr 3, 2009
367
5
Funster No
6,135
Deleted duplicate.
This is strange because according to my machine it failed to post once - never mind twice.
The censors/sensors are having a field day.

To answer the next post!! I am not angry or even mildly riled just enjoy a bit of banter.
Sorry if this offends you Haggy!!!!
 
Last edited:

haganap

LIFE MEMBER
Dec 5, 2007
12,710
25,964
planet earth
Funster No
974
MH
Carthago C Tourer
Exp
I'm an oldbie MH number 9
yes but the problem with your post Wallace is that I might be offended because you were so angry you posted it twice:ROFLMAO:
 

davetthedon

Free Member
Mar 25, 2009
141
2
Malvern, Worcestershire
Funster No
6,053
MH
GreatBig Bugger
Exp
10
Post to "The Wallace"

I apologise profusley if you take offence at "grumpy old fart" but as they say if the shoe fits.....
As for me, as my profile says, I am turning into a G.O.F. at a rapid rate of knots, and can see around me fellow G.O.F.'s in profusion, otherwise why would we be typing in the middle of the morning when we should really be working? People these days get too touchey, there is too much PC out there.
I would like to be the first on this forum to wish everyone a very Happy Christmas, but would I be offending anyone if I did? :RollEyes:

Subscribers  do not see these advertisements

 

haganap

LIFE MEMBER
Dec 5, 2007
12,710
25,964
planet earth
Funster No
974
MH
Carthago C Tourer
Exp
I'm an oldbie MH number 9
you gotta love it, an argument insuring on a post titled friendly arguments:ROFLMAO:
 
OP
OP
Jim

Jim

Ringleader
Jul 19, 2007
36,187
128,610
Sutton on Sea, UK
Funster No
1
MH
Adria Panel Van.
Exp
Since 1988
To strive for total fun is fun but not very realistic.
It is also damned boring and smacks of a Facts type overmoding which is what I was alluding to in my " even they let some blood flow" statement.

No one is overmodding. The post is entirely about not getting personal. Once two posters start down that road, it permeates into every thread they post, one never missing the chance to dig at the other :RollEyes: I am being realistic. I do not want that here, we've managed 2.5 years without that stuff and its been fun.

If you find the lack of personal insults damn boring then, like you say, there are other places to visit where that type of posting is more prevalent:Smile: I know where I would rather be and I'm sure you do too. ::bigsmile: Motorhomes are Fun:thumb:

Subscribers  do not see these advertisements

 

hilldweller

LIFE MEMBER
Dec 5, 2008
605
36,108
Macclesfield
Funster No
5,089
MH
Zilch Mk1
Exp
From Aug 2007
If you find the lack of personal insults damn boring then, like you say, there are other places to visit where that type of posting is more prevalent:Smile:

You couldn't be that inhumane could you Jim, send him to Facts. Sh$t that sort of thing ended nearly 2000 years ago as Rome collapsed. Morituri Te Salutant
 

The Wallace

Free Member
Apr 3, 2009
367
5
Funster No
6,135
Hi Jim,
See how easy it is to cause an argument -
To strive for total fun is fun but not very realistic.
It is also damned boring and smacks of a Facts type overmoding
was what I said but you say "If you find the lack of personal insults damn boring" and "there are other places to visit where that type of posting is more prevalent"

I did not mention personal insults!:ROFLMAO:

I was trying to ease the way between an almost messianic campaign to be "fun or else" and a situation where members can have a sensible, thought out, discussion which may become heated but may also end with 2 members becoming life long buddies.

Those I might fall out with are on my iggy list so I never see their rantings.

As they say "I have been thrown out of better places"

One of our members has a signature about bursting boilers - it is good.

Warmest regards.
 
OP
OP
Jim

Jim

Ringleader
Jul 19, 2007
36,187
128,610
Sutton on Sea, UK
Funster No
1
MH
Adria Panel Van.
Exp
Since 1988
I was trying to ease the way between an almost messianic campaign to be "fun or else"
.

See how easy it is to cause an argument ::bigsmile:

I never said it had to be fun or else.::bigsmile: This is not a thread about over modding or what they do on other forums. Its a simple request about not getting personal when in debate. So I wont:Smile:

Subscribers  do not see these advertisements

 

Join us or log in to post a reply.

To join in you must be a member of MotorhomeFun

Join MotorhomeFun

Join us, it quick and easy!

Log in

Already a member? Log in here.

Funsters who are viewing this thread

Back
Top