What's the best saying you have heard???? (1 Viewer)

[Tony Santara]

If I fell in a bucket of tits I'd come out sucking my thumb :Sad:

 

[slickmouse]

I heard that when the Pope was an alter boy

He couldn't score in a barrel of fannies (crap footballer)

Santa comes once a year and even that's down the chimney

He couldn't put a nut in a Monkeys mouth (bad mechanic)

He didn't know which way to run so i run him over

 

[N Luyetund]

tight...

skin a fart for a ha'penny

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[tick59]

As much use as a glass eye.

 

[stagman]

[A nod's as good as a wink to a blind bat :thumb:

 

[Blisters]

I here you always answer a question with a question? who told you that ?

God made man first, because he didn't want advice from a women

you don't have to come first to be a winner

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[roadtraveller]

It would bring a tear to a glass eye.

As long as a piece of string.

Freeze the skin of a grape.

As tough as shoe leather.

Its dark over Bill's mothers.

Raining cats and dogs.

 

[pappajohn]

I see..........said the blind man

 

[pappajohn]

its like catching a fart in a cullinder

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[Tandy]

Link Removed

"The old believe everything, the middle-aged suspect everything, the young know everything."
-- Oscar Wilde

 

[PFH]

What a week I have had this morning

 

[Blisters]

I once worked in a mill were two girls were arguing, one said i wouldn't give you the time of day, the other replyed i wouldn't give you the steam of my s*%t

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[simsy56]

3 out of 2 people can't do fractions.

You can lead a horse to water, but a pencils got to be lead. (Laurel and Hardy).

If the person who designed the drawing board had got it wrong, what would they have gone back to?

Why do kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Worst job in the world? A suicide bomber instructor!

 

[tyrangie1]

Don't eat yellow snow.
Don't drink water fish make love in it.
May the road rise up to meet you and the wind always be at your back.

 

[finby]

When yer in a hole, stop digging.

I would'nt p**s on him if he were on fire

May the hairs on yer a*se turn to drumsticks and beat the s**t out of you

Your generosity is only surpassed by your exceedingly good looks.

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[iceni]

"when critisising, make your words short and sweet - you may have to eat them."

Phill

 

[vindiboy]

Do you realise that whilst you are working here you are depriving a village of an idiot?

You are living proof that the Flower Pot Men and the Weed had sex.

 

[Rose Royce]

"Up and down like a fiddlers elbow" always makes me smile

It's "Up and down like a whore's draws" and "In and out like a fiddler's elbow".

"A woman is like a beer. They look good, they smell good and you'd step over your own mother just to get one"

"Children are our future. Unless we stop them now".
Both sayings of Homer Simpson

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[Stephen & Jeannie]

If she / he had 2 more brain cells he / she could be a cabbage !

 

[outcast]

It was so hot I was sweating like a peadophile on a school bus

 

[PhilandMena]

Never fry bacon in the nude!

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[PhilandMena]

Never fry bacon in the Nude!


Got the right place this time!!