Now They've Banned Hot Cross Buns

Discussion in 'Motorhome Chat' started by Yorick, Mar 11, 2016.

  1. Yorick

    Yorick Funster

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    Anger as Southend bakery launches Hot Cross Buns WITHOUT ‘offensive’ cross

    A bakery in Southend has upset a number of people in the local community by launching Hot Cross Buns WITHOUT a cross on them – the managing director has said that this ‘difficult decision’ was taken to ensure that nobody in the community gets offended by the cake over the next few weeks.


    Michael Prove has been in charge of the Baker’s Cupboard on Hamlet Street since 2002, and he explained his decision to the Chief Reporter. He said: ‘We have produced thousands of Hot Cross Buns in the past without anybody getting upset, but 2016 has been very different. As soon as our traditional Hot Cross Buns went on sale last week, a maths teacher came in and demanded that we stop selling them as they can be rotated slightly, leaving an ‘X’ – he felt that the buns do not give out a clear signal about whether or not they are a ‘plus’ symbol or a ‘multiply’ symbol.’


    He continued: ‘He accused us of confusing children who are just starting to truly understand the world of mathematics, and to be honest I told him in no uncertain terms that I wouldn’t be willing to remove the cross from the buns. He stormed out of the bakery shop area, and at closing time he came back with four other Maths teachers and they used baseball bats to smash everything up. I don’t want any more trouble in my shop, so regretfully we will no longer be putting crosses on our buns.’


    Unfortunately, this isn’t the first time that fundamentalist maths teachers have gone on the rampage in Southend. Police were called to Southend seafront in 2013 when a group of them stormed Three Shells Beach and threw blankets over women sunbathing in bikinis. According to their ‘leader,’ a pair of contained breasts could be interpreted as a number ‘8’ that has been written the wrong way up, and so the action was necessary to ensure that child numeracy rates remained at an acceptable level in the area.
     
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  2. DuxDeluxe

    DuxDeluxe Funster Life Member

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  3. MH 55 FUN

    MH 55 FUN Funster

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    This must be some sort of very sad joke.

    Pathetic.
     
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  4. Beacons

    Beacons Funster

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    Been in our local gregs since Christmas with cross on.
     
  5. hilldweller

    hilldweller Funster Life Member

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    Clearly someone's watch is a few weeks out.
     
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  6. Tootles

    Tootles Funster

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    What a wind up!! Maths teachers indeed. :Eeek: Where the hell would you find four maths teachers these days. o_O
     
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  7. Enword

    Enword Funster

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    Haha love it :)
     
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  8. DuxDeluxe

    DuxDeluxe Funster Life Member

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    Try the "Suffolk Gazette" as well for more laughs.........

    ......some dimwit sub editor in the tabloids (Mirror, I think) actually printed the story about the farmer having sex with 450 tractors. The guy who runs it was "outed" recently as a retired News International reporter with a warped sense of humour. Their stories are great, but some of the comments are priceless.
     
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  9. movan

    movan Funster Life Member

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    Infinity on the beach

    sounds like a cock tail.
     
  10. Tootles

    Tootles Funster

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    :Eeek::Eeek::Eeek::Eeek::Eeek::Eeek::Eeek::Eeek::Eeek::Eeek::Eeek::Eeek::Eeek::Eeek::Eeek::Eeek::Eeek::Eeek::Eeek:
     
  11. DuxDeluxe

    DuxDeluxe Funster Life Member

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    You want to look it up. Hilarious story. I had a row in the comments on one other story with a woman who thought it was cruel to take the pee out of people from Norfolk and who thought the stories were true
     
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  12. DuxDeluxe

    DuxDeluxe Funster Life Member

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    Stranger things have happened under the pier at low tide........

    .....oh, you mean a drink, don't you? :blush:
     
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  13. Yorick

    Yorick Funster

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    Yes. Yes it was ;)
     
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  14. Mattyjwr

    Mattyjwr Funster Life Member

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    The story about hot cross-less buns must be true because it upset a load of Biffers who are renowned for their intellect ;)
     
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  15. solo 1

    solo 1 Funster Life Member

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    Oi...... We're not all barmy in Southend..... you get a little bit more bun for your money without a cross.......... :moon2: :D
     
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  16. BritStops

    BritStops Trader BritStop Owner

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    That article is inflammatory! Most maths teachers are harmless elbow-patch-wearing folk. The ones that smashed up the bakers were members of the militant group Al-Gebra.

    Steve :)
     
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  17. Brian and Jo

    Brian and Jo Funster Life Member

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    What a load if rollocks.if i believed that story i would think id reached lifes downward spiral:LOL:
    Brian & Jo
     
  18. MichelleRyall

    MichelleRyall Funster

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  19. ShiftZZ

    ShiftZZ Funster Life Member

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    How about they ban Tiger bread, are they not an endangerous species....
     
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  20. Smith and Sharp

    Smith and Sharp Funster

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    I read somewhere lately that Yorkshire puddings was discriminating against other counties along with Cornish pasties and other local dishes of your own area..... It's true.... I read it....!








    :sneaky:
     
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