I will never be anything other than a Newbie (2 Viewers)

Pusser

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Good evening Funsters (or at night is it Munsters :whatthe:). I have read the questions and answers below a hundred times but I still don't get it and probably never will so can someone be very kind and answer what has to be the most boring question so far this year.

Preliminary. Picked up the 1000 year old Toy Granvia and brought it home Friday midday. Since then I have been in deep, deep thought and I wonder if this is sensible or am I making myself look a bigger idiot than I am.

I would like to get rid of the onboards gas which will be 1 foot away from my nose when I go to bed. If that explodes the force of the blast will travel up my nostril and out my backside blowing my dearly beloved through a hole in the side of the van. In the Burstner before I slept with the gas in line with my testicles and worse case scenario would be that they were kick started and back to working again or we had a new type of chandelier on the ceiling; unless of course they made it through the roof light and other campers would wake to find the only campervan on the site with two minature Camos Sat Domes. The very height of cool. :Cool:

As a Navy friend commented on a speech he was making for my funeral just in case I died before he did that in this scenario he would tell everyone that is how I wanted to go. Well, it is not how I want to go see sig.

Sorry I have gone off on one and I will try and get to the thought that happened.

The thought was to get rid of the gas. Maybe later to take out the two ring cooker and replace it with a microwave oven with grill OR temporarily use a JML Halogen cooker while I make up my mind for a permanent fixture in the hole left by the hob. Of course I will keep the hob in pristine condition and gas to stick back in when selling vehicle.

So I first thought a genny to go where the gas willl now not be and then I thought...wait for it.... INVERTOR.

I have worked out using a calculation of two of my fingers that I want a 1800w invertor of not the kind that buggers up the telly even though I will not have a telly, so we can run the m\wave \ Halo when required and make a cup of tea using a main small kettle. Total thingys would be I suppose 1300w for the halo and I don't know how many watties for the kettle hence my calculation may be a tad inaccurate. But its a start.

So that is not really a question but more of a provacation for opinon. The real question is.... Will I need to get a big or more than one leisure battery, will I need a battery master, Eddie V Bitz doesn't seem to do this stuff anymore as far as I can see so where can I get the job professionally done without having to book a ferry. Locate Aylesbury famous for being an unusable spur on the Grand Union, where a big printers used to be, and an MP who I think is challenging me for the title "Village Idiot". Oh nearly forgot. Ducks. Never seen one but we are famous for them. :Eeek:

I also may want to by one of those stick on auto sats from Camos PA s....whatever and need an external plug hole put in and the device of course and I have sent a question about that to Road Pro as suggested on the other sides ad.

I really would be grateful for any advice and I am so sorry this is like another "I was gassed post". :Blush:
 
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sedge

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Would you ever be thinking of going to a meet? Reason I ask is if no-one knows of a sited business in your area who could offer a solution, we have a couple of - nay! a few! - mobile engineer type persons who would be more than willing I'm sure to cast their eyeballs over your conundrum and probably give you sound advice and an estimate. Watch out for the pursed lips and shaking of the heads though, it's not a good sign.
 
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artona

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I can lead you through your gas problem Pusser but I can't promise that after all that you will not electrocute yourself :ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO:

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pappajohn

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one thing springs to mind with this plan......washing !

is your water boiler usable on gas and 230v mains ?

do you plan on hookup sites only ?

will it work on an inverter ?.....yes it will, on a very big one with a very very big bank of batteries......:roflmto: a 2kw boiler will flatten 3 x 110ah batteries in 1 hour via an inverter then of course, the batteries will need recharging.

plus, a 10amp hookup will give you 2300watts (2.3kw) so what are you going to turn off while the water is heating on hookup ?

or.....you could just get a gas safety check/certificate each year, and the chances of it 'blowing up' are pretty slim to none anyway.
 
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artona

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Now its early morning and my mind is awake :Smile: What do you need a camos for if you are not having a television?

There must be millions of campers all over the world and I have never heard of one going up because the gas cylinder blew up. I have seen a cylinder explode on a video but hat was due to the intense heat from the fire that was already raging.

Has your van got the right drop valves, i.e under all connections. Are the pipes in a good state of repair? Have you had a pressure check done of the supply? Have you a gas alarm?

I do remember seeing a van produced that was solely electric but only once and presumably did not catch on. I was speaking to a chap the other day and he had a microwave. He a 2kw inverter and 4 batteries and if he was using the microwave he said he would start the van engine as well

stew
 
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Pusser

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Thank you all very much for replies especiallly when you could be doing something more interest on a Saturday night than have to think on my problems.

Lovely to see you again Arty although I did notice pursed lips were not on offer as with Ms. Sedge. :winky:

I am reading through your answer PappaJohn (Love that name as I too am a pappajohn in real life and a grandpappajohn shortly to be 10 times over these coming weeks.)

I have now only a very small, almost 16' thing, similar to a VW Transporter type thing so no hot water for me, the water tank I carry out to fill up, (must by fold up trolley :helpsos: ) as there is barely room for me to get in at 18 stone round so we have a mammoth task fitting all other stuff around me. Having said that, I have lost a pound this week, mainly running around sorting out the purchase of Granny, the new name of our motorhome (for want of a better description). So the Grannyvan will normally be outside hotels or mobile homes but when travelling it will be useful if we want to stay at a lovely location, not feeling well as I have a sort of Menieres disease, my lovely wife who does nothing else other than look after me suffers from migraine a lot. God knows who causes her all these headaches. :Eeek:

When we do stop over night, (a couple of nights coming up to try out everything this week), we would normally go to a campsite with electric hook up and maybe sometime the BIG aires on French motorways as we are frightened of small aires.

But the main thing is I don't want gas partly because I am having enough trouble keeping my parts stuck on without them being blown off by a gas tank and also because a small tank, should it run out would be unable to be replaced in France unless I go Gaslo as I did before, or go for the red tank brigade. None of those I want to do. I really want nothing to do although I except the port pottie and fresh water will be down to me as always.

A genny is too much hassle and really too big although it would fit but an inverter takes up little room and if I was to get 1800w available to me for short periods of time I would be a happy bunny.

I can see batteries are a requirement and I reckon I may get two in.

So I cannot be persuaded to keep gas.
I don't really want more petrol around me so no genny.
I do want an inverter even if I have to compromise on useage but I must be able to cook something in the halogen and I could forgo the use of the kettle while that is happening of course.
I don't mind going up to big batteries and my TV and StickonSat I will input into a HD laptop to watch the news mainly.
I have, of course, no boiler and no hotwater. :cry:

I have tried to be as brief as I can and where possible kept to the point. I cannot stand posts that ramble on about everything other than the task in hand. Why people do this I just don't know?

Thanks again PJ and if you don't reply to this, I and other members probably will not be surprised but thanks in advance if you do.

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Pusser

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Now its early morning and my mind is awake :Smile: What do you need a camos for if you are not having a television?

There must be millions of campers all over the world and I have never heard of one going up because the gas cylinder blew up. I have seen a cylinder explode on a video but hat was due to the intense heat from the fire that was already raging.

Has your van got the right drop valves, i.e under all connections. Are the pipes in a good state of repair? Have you had a pressure check done of the supply? Have you a gas alarm?

I do remember seeing a van produced that was solely electric but only once and presumably did not catch on. I was speaking to a chap the other day and he had a microwave. He a 2kw inverter and 4 batteries and if he was using the microwave he said he would start the van engine as well

stew

Good points arty. I can see the merits of a TV if I buy a Stickonsat although I could use it just to impress the other campers and pretend to watch TV with burst of giggles and cries of, "What you watching that rubbish for", from the missus. But I will be using an HD Laptop as there is no point have too screens that can do the same thing and the laptop probably better other than sound. I shall get a USB TV stick and off I go. But I need the tv really for bloomberg and News which I am addicted too mainly because single handly I could run this planet but no one seems to believe me.
 
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Pusser

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I have just been running the comments and questions and ideas to wifey woman and she asked some pertinent questions.

She said, "Why do you think I want to cook in laybye or on top of a mountain and surely whenever we do want to stop over anywhere other than a campsite with hookup. All I want is an electric kettle to make a cup of tea and the world is not short of resturants if we need to eat."

It seems therefore that I have wasted everyones time and I am so sorry to have said so much, about so little for so long.

My new question is, alll I would like is an inverter to be able to boil a reasonable kettle for a cup of tea..

I do promise this question is not a waste of time. The Halo \ microwave we will use only on hookup sites as pointed out above.

:thanks:
p.s. Narrowed down to a mere 800w kettle. Watch this post as I may get down to some twigs, paper and a box of matches.
 
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slobadoberbob

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There I was thinking Sunday morning was going to be quite

Hi,

There I was thinkin gSunday would be quite.. nice to see someone else in the running for long posts..eh JIM? ...

I use a 1500 watt pure wave invertor.. had it fitted by Eddie of Van Bitz.. suprised to see he is no longer doing the battery master.. great bit of kit.

The first issue I can see you have is that you need a sizable battery bank if you are not going to convert generator power to the batteries. OK whiule on ECH you can do so ..i.e ECH to Batteries to Invertor.. Sterling do a 2000 watts .. not a number on a box, but a real 2000 watts. So with a low voltage kettle or mircrowave you could use the the invertor.. but if on ECH what is the point? as you have power subject to the amps at the distribution tree.. i.e 6 amps, 10 amps or 16 amps etc.,

The invertors work well, as I say have had one for two seasons and it also charges the b atteries either from the ECH or as in my case a generator. Being an RV .. we use LPG in chassis tanks for all sorts of things, like heating, fridge and cooking.. so it is a part of any American Motorhome make up. We also have a chassis mounted 4 kw genny... but we are only 24'9" long.. not big by American standards.

Would I go for an invertor? yes if you have big enough batteries.. I run a normal domestic 230v 26" tv and most things like a large 1700 watt start up mircowave (have to have the geeny on for that).. but think about how you will recharge those batteries as an invertor will take a lot of power out and they use power just if they are on.

A lot of research is needed.. but I can recommend Van Bitz.. they are not perhaps the cheapest, but they are very professional and I would have no issues recommending them.. They have fitted for me..Backup camera, Saterlite dome equipment, Strike back alarm, Battery master, and a BM! NASA unit as well as the Sterling pure sine wave invertor.

BOb:thumb:

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artona

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in fact I like that blue so much I might buy one myself :ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO:
 
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Pusser

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You have just bought and end to what could be the longest post about bugger all in history.

How many years will it take to boil. :ROFLMAO:

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Pusser

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I use a 1500 watt pure wave invertor.. had it fitted by Eddie of Van Bitz.. suprised to see he is no longer doing the battery master.. great bit of kit.A lot of research is needed.. but I can recommend Van Bitz.. they are not perhaps the cheapest, but they are very professional and I would have no issues recommending them.. They have fitted for me..Backup camera, Saterlite dome equipment, Strike back alarm, Battery master, and a BM! NASA unit as well as the Sterling pure sine wave invertor.

BOb:thumb:

Thank you so much for the detailed info which is much appreciated. I must admit after seeing your avatar that I checked the war crimes tribunal "most wanted" and can report you are not mentioned. Well done for not doing genocide and stuff. That's what Funsters want to hear and I expect one could be banned for acts of genocide if not for very long posts for no apparent reason from me.

I know Eds and he was first port of call but inverter did not appear as it used to on his website. I had a camos dome and some other bits fitted by him and also, a job that Chelston Motorhomes could not do in 3 visits, Eddie did in half an hour. Guess what the problem was. Battery terminal not tight. :ROFLMAO:

If Eddies does that thing I will go there but if not Roadpro Man has been very helpful to me whom I turned to when Eddies site had no inverters or search facility that I could find. But in fairness, he has a lovely wife and Mrs. Bitz works very hard for the company as well.

Thank you once again for the effort and I wish there was something I could do to help people on here but I am crap at everything except eating...and :Blush:
 
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artona

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Buy two and halve the time :ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO:
 
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sedge

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How many years will it take to boil.

I was hoping somebody could answer that question Pusser cos I saw them the other day over the road and wondered ! (it's a caravan dealers and shop; they weren't on the pavement)
 
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Wildman

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anyone contemplating this route would do well to have a grasp of ohms law.
Watts = Amps times volts

W
-----
I xV

or

V
-----
I x R


w= watts
I =Amps
V = Volts
R = Resistance measured in ohms
the first is the one we are concerned with and by knowing any two the third can be calculated. So if you first add up the Wattages of the items you want to run and then divide by the voltage it will give you I (in amps)
now your battery has a capacity measured in amp/hour, i.e. so many amps for 1 hour.
so taking a 110 amp/hr battery that is misleading for a start as batteries should not be run down to less than 50% giving you 55amps for one hour.
(a decent inverter will shut down when voltage gets too low)
1800W watt inverter at full power will use as a very rough guide 150amps (not allowing for other losses.) so your 110amp/hr battery would be flat in 20mins.
That power has to be replaced somehow. you would need a massive array of solar panells to cope and a genny could take at least three hours to recharge it. Adding extra batteries increases the useable amps but also increases the time taken to recharge. so do a power audit, see how much power you will actually use and work out how long it will take to recharge it. The other thing to think about is battery wiring, that is NEVER large enough from standard to prevent overheating and could well act as a heating element frying your unmentionables ready for breakfast.
All power used must be replaced from somewhere, site power supplies are normally rated at 6amp, and much less in France so to recharge your batteries and replace the 150 amps you have taken out will take 25 hours. then you can use it again.Hee Hee.
running the engine it may do it in much less time depending on your charge rate. So do your sums before you go any further. Whatever you use has to be replaced a battery is not an endless resource.
 
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Pusser

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anyone contemplating this route would do well to have a grasp of ohms law.
Watts = Amps times volts

W
-----
I xV

or

V
-----
I x R


w= watts
I =Amps
V = Volts
R = Resistance measured in ohms
the first is the one we are concerned with and by knowing any two the third can be calculated. So if you first add up the Wattages of the items you want to run and then divide by the voltage it will give you I (in amps)
now your battery has a capacity measured in amp/hour, i.e. so many amps for 1 hour.
so taking a 110 amp/hr battery that is misleading for a start as batteries should not be run down to less than 50% giving you 55amps for one hour.
(a decent inverter will shut down when voltage gets too low)
1800W watt inverter at full power will use as a very rough guide 150amps (not allowing for other losses.) so your 110amp/hr battery would be flat in 20mins.
That power has to be replaced somehow. you would need a massive array of solar panells to cope and a genny could take at least three hours to recharge it. Adding extra batteries increases the useable amps but also increases the time taken to recharge. so do a power audit, see how much power you will actually use and work out how long it will take to recharge it. The other thing to think about is battery wiring, that is NEVER large enough from standard to prevent overheating and could well act as a heating element frying your unmentionables ready for breakfast.
All power used must be replaced from somewhere, site power supplies are normally rated at 6amp, and much less in France so to recharge your batteries and replace the 150 amps you have taken out will take 25 hours. then you can use it again.Hee Hee.
running the engine it may do it in much less time depending on your charge rate. So do your sums before you go any further. Whatever you use has to be replaced a battery is not an endless resource.

Thank you Wildman. Love your camel. Is it one or two humper? I am copying and pasting this into my odd and sods folder (not the camel) so I can refer to it tomorrow by which time I will have forgotten all.

Artys 12 volt kettle is not looking so silly after all? I think I am now too worried to proceed further with an inverter and seriously thing upgrading my motorhome to a two vacumn flask model. In fact I am going to do that. All this is beyond me and if it goes tits up, (as sometimes happens to me :helptitanic: ) cue Celine Dion, I will stress out and run up a bill with the Samaratians.

SO thank you everyone for all the effort you have put in and thank you so very much for the advice and comments and I am so sorry to have chickened out but I think it best for me and the members that I shut up and get back on subjects that I do understand like... :whistle: ....ahem...well other subjects anyway.

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artona

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Buy two and it will take the same time. Buy half of one and it will take half the time.

No no no no no you put one cup of water in each rather than two cups in one. The other way is simply to make the wife go without :shout::shout::shout:
 
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GJH

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May I come at this problem from a slightly different angle?

If the on board gas were to explode, thereby destroying nostril, backside and van side (through the agency of strategically placed dearly beloved), then (IMHO) the desire for a refreshing cup of tea would probably be less then immediate. This renders the question of efficacy of a mains or 12v kettle rather redundant.

In all likelihood the gas will not explode so nothing to worry about. However, should the worst happen than I am sure that (in the interests of science and friendship) Jenny could pop across the road to check the kettle so that your soul would not wander the Earth forever seeking the answer.
 
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Pusser

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No no no no no you put one cup of water in each rather than two cups in one. The other way is simply to make the wife go without :shout::shout::shout:
Not often you manage to dig yourself out but you have obviously improved with time. I won't mention this to the missus as there is already to much violence in the world and she has the ability to make men cry. Sometimes with criticism and sometimes merely pain. Take my word for it. ::bigsmile:

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Peter JohnsCross MH

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Welcome back Pusser, how did you get on with that kayak you bought of me last year:ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO:

Peter

P.S just light a camp fire and boil the kettle on that:thumb:

Peter
 
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artona

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Welcome back Pusser, how did you get on with that kayak you bought of me last year:ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO:

Peter

P.S just light a camp fire and boil the kettle on that:thumb:

Peter


Is there not a chance of burning a hole in the bottom of the Kayak if he does that Peter :roflmto: :ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO:Drowning has the same effect as experiencing a gas explosion :shout:
 
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PenelopePitstop

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I would like to get rid of the onboards gas which will be 1 foot away from my nose when I go to bed. If that explodes the force of the blast will travel up my nostril and out my backside blowing my dearly beloved through a hole in the side of the van. In the Burstner before I slept with the gas in line with my testicles and worse case scenario would be that they were kick started and back to working again or we had a new type of chandelier on the ceiling; unless of course they made it through the roof light and other campers would wake to find the only campervan on the site with two minature Camos Sat Domes. The very height of cool. :Cool:

Pusser - you've done it again! I tried twice to read it out to Rex but just couldn't! He had to go and search for the post himself!! :roflmto::roflmto::roflmto:

Keep up the good work!!:thumb::thumb:
 
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Pusser

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Welcome back Pusser, how did you get on with that kayak you bought of me last year:ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO:

Peter

P.S just light a camp fire and boil the kettle on that:thumb:

Peter

Nice to speak to you again and by all reports your company is going from strength to strength. Honesty and care of the customer certainly pays dividends.

The Kayak or as we call it, Granddads water wings, I think I actually bought the year before last year but you may be right but I think you are wrong. It had one very successful outing which my eldest grandchildren now in their teens and the 3 of them had the time of their life in it for the week they joined us at Portriagnes where we pilgramage annually. I bought a huge roll of twine and tied it to the bow :Eeek: (ten years in the Navy and I have not forgotten much :moon: not even that.), and the granny knot failed (sorry, another nautical term. Once I am in that vogue I cannot but help come out with professional jargon. I do apologise. :sorry2: ) and the twins headed off towards Africa. But they were already competant sailors as they did a Duke of Edingburgh award thing and paddled back when they were ready. Brilliant canoes. I did try it but when I saw the whole beach looking at me with sad smiles on the faces I released I must have looked like a Blue Whale humping a seal and gave up almost immediately. It has not been used since so I think I will give it to the boys. I would have given it too them earlier but they didn't look after a quality rubber dingey thing so I sulked.

I can see the twin paddles now as type and when I think I could have been the first person to paddle around the world in a Johns Cross canoe it brings a tear to my eye. I've failed you haven't I. All the dreams, the planning, the cost and the publicity you would have got as I finally paddled back into Portsmouth after my circumcision of the world was lost. I am so sorry. I filling up. Gotta go. :cry:
 
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Pusser

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Steve,

Not even Pusser would light a fire in his Kayak, from what I heard he has not gor it wet yet:ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO:

Peter
Thank you for your complete trust in my competance. (Many people have made that error in the past probably starting with Mum and Dad when I was a sperm) I do often wonder what sort of sperm I was.

Did I really beat 6 million in the race for the egg. Surely that is worth a prize or at least some mention on Newsnight.

Sperm wins the 3 inch marathon. I just pity the one that came in last. He must have been absolutely knackered. Even may have gone the wrong way and ended up, tired, exhausted and dead on his tail in a bladder.

I think a moments silence for the sperm number 6,000,000 would be appropriate.

Looser... :ROFLMAO:

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You could always wild camp in Rotten Ronnies car parks (MacDs) and have the benefit of 'food',for want of a better word and WiFi to keep in touch.
On a slightly serious note you could use a Primus stove to cook,the paraffin ones will work on diesel and heat water with a Kelly kettle.
Pusser you are a very rare person,you can ask a serious question and we don't realise until we stop laughing at how you have phrased it.
:ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO:
 
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Pusser

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Jun 18, 2011
188
192
Bucks
Funster No
16,939
MH
A week away
Exp
On and off 1981
You could always wild camp in Rotten Ronnies car parks (MacDs) and have the benefit of 'food',for want of a better word and WiFi to keep in touch.
On a slightly serious note you could use a Primus stove to cook,the paraffin ones will work on diesel and heat water with a Kelly kettle.
Pusser you are a very rare person,you can ask a serious question and we don't realise until we stop laughing at how you have phrased it.
:ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO:
Lovely to see u BF. I didn't realise how many people on here that I know. And the best thing of all, the word Fun in the title of the website does not contravene the Trades Description Act.
Sticking to the serious theme. Now I have run through the suggestions with Mrs Pusser she is now even scared of cooking a meal on our electric hob so it may mean wie have to pack sandwhiches for our trips and pour our beloved tea from flasks.

I bought a lovely air conditioner today from Homebase complete with remote control. Proudly showed it to the missus at lunch time and it is now in pride of place back in Homebase. She was horrified that I could even think of introducing a full size Dalek as she called into her lovely home.

Anyway I'm not talking to her now and have withdrawn all her conjugal rights. :Cool: (Well, one of them as it is the only one she gets) :ROFLMAO: So a crap New Year for her.

ONly just realised there is a thank you button AND a like button. So I do apologise for not using it for all the time I should have said thankyou at the very least. So a big thank you to all to make up for it.
 
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