I needed a fridge (1 Viewer)

[Big bus man]

Christmas, it's a funny time of year, problem is I get very confused.

I needed a new fridge so I went to put my boots on to go to the shops but they had a hole in the so I had to get a new pair, anyway off I go to Selfridges only to find they don't sell fridges ok then I can at least pop over the road to Boots to get some shoes, No, apparently they don't sell boots so I had to make a list of alternative options but needed a notepad and pencil so naturally I popped into Sketchers, seems they don't sell them Not having much luck I headed for the Subway to catch a train, crazy as it seems they sell rolls their it's not a station at all but I was in luck as down the road was the Watch Station, maybe I could catch a train there but no you guessed, no trains stop at that shop either By now I am feeling hungry so off I went to Curry's for a Chicken tekka, well blow me down the place was full of FRIDGES!

 

[Big bus man]

Still need my new Boots so off I went to have a New Look, I knew they would Costa lot of money so I took all my loose change, unfortunatly I dropped some and saw a Poundland on the pavement and watched as it rolled down the drain, all that running water made me desperate for a wee so I headed for the Littlewoods nearby to go behind a tree, strange how many Oddbins there were around, Three blue two Blacks, Next I went back to the drain and what a Game I had trying to recover my pound, what seemed to be a nice guy came to help, what a Topman he was getting my money out so I offered to buy him lunch at Greggs, eating all those doughnuts my Waitrose by many pounds, I had a very Fat Face, but what about the Pound this guy got back for me, well he went off with it, what a Liberty so a went after him, he had a face like that bloke Steven Hawkins, Bazaar I know but he looked just like him although this guy's name was Mat Alan. I soon gave up looking for him I would Simply Be a pound short so I guess he wasn't as Co-Operative as I first thought, what a day, still didn't get my Boots but I guess my old pair will get me through some more winters Ann Summers.

 

[Big bus man]

Having watched a cookery program on TV where they made some bread, they suggested giving it a twist by adding some flavouring like cheese or spices. Now I’m no cook and I had no idea where to buy the ingredients but having decided I wanted to flavour my bread with Dill I made a list and trotted off to the local shopping centre.

My list was simple, just 4 items, obviously the dough, some yeast to make it rise, some salt and finally the fresh Dill. So into Sainsbury’s I went with my list and there was the salt but they had just sold out of fresh Dill so I asked the assistant if he knew where I might find the other ingredients, “no idea sir” he said perhaps you could ask in Debenhams over there, the assistant in Debenhams said “sorry we don’t sell food items sir, perhaps you should ask at the shop next door”, so in I went to Ann Summers next door and asked the lovely girl on the desk “ Hi, do you have any Dill Dough and something to help it rise” and to my amazement she said YES it looked nothing like food I saw on the telly so I asked if she knew how to use the items she had supplied and she told me I should work on it with my hands for a while then let it rise and when it is ready stick it in.

Still have no idea what she was talking about, in the end I just bought a bun and put it in the oven

^{_{Subscribers  do not see these advertisements}}

 

[scotjimland]

you're on a 'roll'

keep it up

 

[Big bus man]

Would you go to Bath to buy a bath, would you go to Leeds to buy a dog lead, maybe your car diff is broken then Cardiff seems an ideal place to go...I went to Cockermouth once for a ham sandwich, now wish I'd gone to Sandwich