Funny campsite reviews

Jul 26, 2017
436
923
Macclesfield
Funster No
49,644
MH
Elddis Accordo 125
Exp
Since 2016
Reading the reviews people leave often make me wonder. Two good ones recently:

"the downside of this campsite is the noisy birds in the trees that start singing just as the sun rises...."

And another:

"this campsite is lovely but at night it is very dark..." (to which the owner replied along the lines of "in the countryside it does tend to get rather dark at night...").

Have you seen any good ones?
 

suavecarve

LIFE MEMBER
Aug 18, 2009
4,510
23,269
Surrey/Hants
Funster No
8,035
MH
Rollerteam 690
Exp
July 09
A few of my reviews on aires in france. I think they come under the category of honest reviews

Didnt stay overnight, i really dont know why. Lets ask the wife. Oh she still hasnt given me an answer.IMHO it was a lovely spot 100 yards from the river/canal to ride into Basle. Kind of weird going through customs then realising you dont have your passport to get back.

Long termers are still there. Ancient caravan and a dumpy old wreck of a motorhome with a couple of dogs attached to a piece of string. I m sure you get the message here, however great place to go and take a look especially place napolean

This was a lovely little spot with 12th or 13th century abbey and they had a most fantastic fete on with marquees and horses in a medieval style then the worst thunderstorm i have ever been involved in came down the seine and marquees were literally flying over our motorhomes. Trees uprooted and people trying to gra the animals. Absolute devastation. We could see the course of the typhoon the next day where 50 metres wide of wood was missing in different places along the road. We thought we were going to be rolled over. Anyway aprt from that it was nice

Truely awful stopping place. the mix of cars and local youths didnt make you feel safe at all. we stayed but only because we were knackered. the water place wasnt fit to use for cows. Avoid like the plague

Parked here overnight a couple of times. Lovely lake, shame about the rats but they are harmless, just a bit more confident than the average rat and only in the corner near the exit of the water so nowhere near the beach

Confirmed April 2016 height barrier in operation. Go further up the road past the rather unhelpful tourist information, make sure you pop in to complain and then you can park along the road on the left hand side opposite the summer luge.

Easily the worst aire in france. Possible to stay overnight. Local sellers have most things for sale at night including herion and cocaine. Several people looking to buy. Didnt feel safe to even open roof. No sleep at all. Wonderful view of the river just beyond the local drunks.

Stayed here for about an hour before being told of the parking point at the lakes which is by far superior. This is out of town and only good if you want to go to the spa which was bloody expensive and not open for swimming most of the day. Fill up with water and run

If you love prisons, particularly the ones with high fences and barbed wire on the top which is run by vest wearing imitators of the non paid up members of the camping club then this is your place. You will not find me back here

Top of the hill in car park 4 (if i remember rightly) but its all signposted from outside the town. Lavender rich area the town is on a hill with great views of Mt Ventoux. Probably best not to down a bottle and a bit of wine then try cycling up there in 40+ degrees early the next morning. Just trust me on that one ! TOwns quirky but very hilly, free with water

This says daytime parking only. Not from the experience we had. 3 euros collected early evening with free use of water and dump. flat area and a must for any keen masochistic cyclists with mt ventoux . town is full of cycle shops. One pushbike was 12K ! Thats what i sold my motorhome for ! Also not too sure if it was paying or just some entrepreneurial kid who just bought a receipt book and goes round at night collecting 3 euros off 30 vans.

Park between the olive trees and shed loads of parking. We located this at the time through another resource not FP but no problem staying. They lock the gates at night but we didnt know. The walled surrounds are jumpable if youre fairly fit, middle aged and have only had 2 large leffes and bottle of wine. Really nice farm shop you just ought to go in, even out of courtesy. No obligation to purchase, but it was all good. Dirt cheap apricot juice.

We got here and all i can say is the moment we turned up we were marked. All eyes looked upon us with english van that just went directly into the centre of a travellers camp. We parked next to the water fill up which wasnt working and by the time we had done that we must have had 4 kids aged 8-10 like vultures on new prey eyeing the van up and down seeing if our tyres would fit their van. We ran, we ran like the wind, we didnt look behind us, and never ever again. nice view of flamingoes on the way in though

What a stunning town. Beats Carcasonne hands down as no camera wielding ignorant non paying attention tourists going into meaningless shops and bumping into you for overinflated priced gunk. The aire is roadside and basic but actually surprisingly Q. The town centre is very very good

Good to go shopping for an hour but no more for fear of the thousands of pigeons with chronic gut ache living in the trees under which you park your van. Seriously bad place to park a beloved motorhome

Having stopped here it is great entertainment watching the locals in their big card creating car parking spaces by nudging smaller cars out of the way. Surprisingly they were an old couple and knew exactly what they were doing. Hence it is very packed here and next to very busy road. We located the citadelle car park (nearby) and it would have been less stress but not as comical. Lovely town with swimming but wouldnt park here again

We like this spot. car park next to a little playground and sports field 5 mins form town. very q. dumping facilities but for water you just wait like a vulture til somebody pays and everybody else fills up after as the tap doesnt turn off !

Have tried to stop here a few times and the trick is to put your french parking hat on and dont care. You ll never get next to the canal but there is a bit of land near to the bridge which is solid ground. If that fails then huge park and you could create an overflow in any of those car parks. Took some finding to start with.

Collection used to be about 1800 on weekdays so staying saturday and sunday night was free. Wrong this time, had to pay when someone came round. What a beautiful spot though. walk or cycle round the 7 kms of lake and its like Nice in the summer at night with a lovely promenade and watching the sunset here is a national sport with bottle of wine. The town however is best described as a dump but there is no reason to go there. Lidls just round the corner swimming pool within the lake on the other side. If you get in great if you dont your imagination can easily work out numerous other parking spots for free
 
Feb 16, 2013
15,675
30,427
uttoxeter
Funster No
24,713
MH
ambulance conversion
Exp
50 years
A few of my reviews on aires in france. I think they come under the category of honest reviews

Didnt stay overnight, i really dont know why. Lets ask the wife. Oh she still hasnt given me an answer.IMHO it was a lovely spot 100 yards from the river/canal to ride into Basle. Kind of weird going through customs then realising you dont have your passport to get back.

Long termers are still there. Ancient caravan and a dumpy old wreck of a motorhome with a couple of dogs attached to a piece of string. I m sure you get the message here, however great place to go and take a look especially place napolean

This was a lovely little spot with 12th or 13th century abbey and they had a most fantastic fete on with marquees and horses in a medieval style then the worst thunderstorm i have ever been involved in came down the seine and marquees were literally flying over our motorhomes. Trees uprooted and people trying to gra the animals. Absolute devastation. We could see the course of the typhoon the next day where 50 metres wide of wood was missing in different places along the road. We thought we were going to be rolled over. Anyway aprt from that it was nice

Truely awful stopping place. the mix of cars and local youths didnt make you feel safe at all. we stayed but only because we were knackered. the water place wasnt fit to use for cows. Avoid like the plague

Parked here overnight a couple of times. Lovely lake, shame about the rats but they are harmless, just a bit more confident than the average rat and only in the corner near the exit of the water so nowhere near the beach

Confirmed April 2016 height barrier in operation. Go further up the road past the rather unhelpful tourist information, make sure you pop in to complain and then you can park along the road on the left hand side opposite the summer luge.

Easily the worst aire in france. Possible to stay overnight. Local sellers have most things for sale at night including herion and cocaine. Several people looking to buy. Didnt feel safe to even open roof. No sleep at all. Wonderful view of the river just beyond the local drunks.

Stayed here for about an hour before being told of the parking point at the lakes which is by far superior. This is out of town and only good if you want to go to the spa which was bloody expensive and not open for swimming most of the day. Fill up with water and run

If you love prisons, particularly the ones with high fences and barbed wire on the top which is run by vest wearing imitators of the non paid up members of the camping club then this is your place. You will not find me back here

Top of the hill in car park 4 (if i remember rightly) but its all signposted from outside the town. Lavender rich area the town is on a hill with great views of Mt Ventoux. Probably best not to down a bottle and a bit of wine then try cycling up there in 40+ degrees early the next morning. Just trust me on that one ! TOwns quirky but very hilly, free with water

This says daytime parking only. Not from the experience we had. 3 euros collected early evening with free use of water and dump. flat area and a must for any keen masochistic cyclists with mt ventoux . town is full of cycle shops. One pushbike was 12K ! Thats what i sold my motorhome for ! Also not too sure if it was paying or just some entrepreneurial kid who just bought a receipt book and goes round at night collecting 3 euros off 30 vans.

Park between the olive trees and shed loads of parking. We located this at the time through another resource not FP but no problem staying. They lock the gates at night but we didnt know. The walled surrounds are jumpable if youre fairly fit, middle aged and have only had 2 large leffes and bottle of wine. Really nice farm shop you just ought to go in, even out of courtesy. No obligation to purchase, but it was all good. Dirt cheap apricot juice.

We got here and all i can say is the moment we turned up we were marked. All eyes looked upon us with english van that just went directly into the centre of a travellers camp. We parked next to the water fill up which wasnt working and by the time we had done that we must have had 4 kids aged 8-10 like vultures on new prey eyeing the van up and down seeing if our tyres would fit their van. We ran, we ran like the wind, we didnt look behind us, and never ever again. nice view of flamingoes on the way in though

What a stunning town. Beats Carcasonne hands down as no camera wielding ignorant non paying attention tourists going into meaningless shops and bumping into you for overinflated priced gunk. The aire is roadside and basic but actually surprisingly Q. The town centre is very very good

Good to go shopping for an hour but no more for fear of the thousands of pigeons with chronic gut ache living in the trees under which you park your van. Seriously bad place to park a beloved motorhome

Having stopped here it is great entertainment watching the locals in their big card creating car parking spaces by nudging smaller cars out of the way. Surprisingly they were an old couple and knew exactly what they were doing. Hence it is very packed here and next to very busy road. We located the citadelle car park (nearby) and it would have been less stress but not as comical. Lovely town with swimming but wouldnt park here again

We like this spot. car park next to a little playground and sports field 5 mins form town. very q. dumping facilities but for water you just wait like a vulture til somebody pays and everybody else fills up after as the tap doesnt turn off !

Have tried to stop here a few times and the trick is to put your french parking hat on and dont care. You ll never get next to the canal but there is a bit of land near to the bridge which is solid ground. If that fails then huge park and you could create an overflow in any of those car parks. Took some finding to start with.

Collection used to be about 1800 on weekdays so staying saturday and sunday night was free. Wrong this time, had to pay when someone came round. What a beautiful spot though. walk or cycle round the 7 kms of lake and its like Nice in the summer at night with a lovely promenade and watching the sunset here is a national sport with bottle of wine. The town however is best described as a dump but there is no reason to go there. Lidls just round the corner swimming pool within the lake on the other side. If you get in great if you dont your imagination can easily work out numerous other parking spots for free
Pity you didn't say where you were.

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MillieMoocher

LIFE MEMBER
Jul 18, 2015
1,042
10,218
West Yorkshire
Funster No
37,199
MH
Autosleeper Kingham
Exp
40 years under canvas: Motorhome 2016 To 2020
Easily the worst aire in france. Possible to stay overnight. Local sellers have most things for sale at night including herion and cocaine. Several people looking to buy. Didnt feel safe to even open roof. No sleep at all. Wonderful view of the river just beyond the local drunks.

This was a gem :notworthy2:
 

suavecarve

LIFE MEMBER
Aug 18, 2009
4,510
23,269
Surrey/Hants
Funster No
8,035
MH
Rollerteam 690
Exp
July 09
Pity you didn't say where you were.
They are available on searchforsites but i ll do a spoiler.

Saint Louis La Chaussée
La Roche Sur Yon
Jumièges
Vienne
Mormoiron
Chamonix
Arles
Clairveaux les lacs
Aosta
Sault
Digne
Malaucene
Domaine saint Fermin
saintes Marie de la mer
Mirepoix
Aurillac
Sisteron
Belley
Thaon les vogues
Nantua

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