Childbirth...

Discussion in 'Motorhome Chat' started by mogbl, Nov 20, 2014.

  1. mogbl

    mogbl Funster

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    Should children witness childbirth?
    Due to a power outage, only one paramedic responded to the call.
    The house was very dark so the paramedic asked Kathleen, a 5 yr old girl to hold a
    torch high over her mummy so he could see while he helped deliver the baby.
    Very diligently, Kathleen did as she was asked.
    Heidi pushed and pushed and after a little while, Connor was born.
    The paramedic lifted him by his little feet and spanked him on his bottom.
    Connor began to cry.
    The paramedic then thanked Kathleen for her help and asked the wide-eyed 5-yr old
    what she thought about what she had just witnessed. Kathleen quickly responded,
    "He shouldn't have crawled in there in the first place ....
    skelp his arse again!"
     
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  2. Puddleduck

    Puddleduck Funster

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    The old ones are the errrrrrr.........
     
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  3. DuxDeluxe

    DuxDeluxe Funster Life Member

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    :groan::groan:

    Or should I say "pant" and "push"? :imoutahere:
     
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  4. John Laidler

    John Laidler Funster

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    I witnessed my birth. Don't remember it though.
     
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  5. dryad

    dryad Funster

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    am often asked what sign i was born under, think it was the one that said exit..
     
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  6. sedge

    sedge Funster

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    The 4 year old grandson of a lady I worked with didn't witness the birth, itself (dad delivered baby on the kitchen floor with the phone to Emergency Services pressed to his ear!) but did witness his mum's waters breaking.

    Dad rushed round next door with him and by the time he got back 2 minutes later it was a 'Dial 999' jobbie.

    Liam proudly told everyone he met for quite some time afterwards 'My mummy WET herself - all over the kitchen floor!' and nothing at all about 'My new sister' ..........
     
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  7. Chris

    Chris Funster Life Member

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    I was born by Caesarian section.

    It hasn't really affected me but when I leave the house I tend to use the window rather than the front door.
     
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  8. DuxDeluxe

    DuxDeluxe Funster Life Member

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    We all wondered why you dress in a toga and like gladiatorial conflicts... ;)
     
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  9. old-mo

    old-mo Funster Extra Special Life Member

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    I was born under a gooseberry bush at the bottom of the garden..

    Mummy told me so... (y)
     
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  10. pappajohn

    pappajohn Funster Life Member

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    A stork brought me...

    the-stork-does-deliver-babies-the-flying-tortoise.jpg
     
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  11. Puddleduck

    Puddleduck Funster

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    When my daughter was born my son told everyone at school that the only exciting thing to have happened over Easter was that his Grandma had come and taken him to Colwyn Bay.... when asked about anything else he just looked blank until prompted - "oh and Mummy went to hospital and brought back a baby sister", obviously not a big deal then, certainly not as good as a trip to Colwyn Bay!
     
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  12. sedge

    sedge Funster

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    Pete came home from school one day to be told and see for himself - his litt;e brother.

    he was asked what he thought of him at some point shortly thereafter, so he told the truth. He was alright, he supposed - but he'd much rather have had a dog.

    Luckily for both of them, John grew on him later.
     
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